Still, if one were paranoid AND believed in zombies, there’s been enough disturbing events (i.e. disturbing in any case) to make one be afraid:
A man in Miami chews the face off another man, allegedly while under some kind of drug-induced psychosis.
Another man in New Jersey goes insane and slices his belly open, then throws his own intestines at police.
Yet another man in Maryland admits to eating his roommate’s heart and brain.
A Canadian snuff film actor admits to murdering, dismembering, raping and eating a young victim, mails body parts to a newspaper, then goes on the run.
Finally, doctors take it upon themselves to calm a panicked public as the media hyperventilates over a Georgia woman whose leg had to be amputated to stop the spread of flesh-eating bacteria, now known to infect thousands of Americans every year.
As if this bloody chaos weren’t bizarre enough, it gets weirder still: All of these events happened in the same week.
Naturally, the Internet wants to know: is it — being, you know, The Zombie Apocalypse — finally happening? According to the Centers for Disease Control (CDC), the answer to that question is officially no.
Hey, with all that grim news, ya gotta find a way to laugh. (And thankfully, we Christians know that the bodily resurrection at Judgment Day will be one unto eternal life or death, with renewed, perfected bodies, rather than of hungry ‘undead’ corpses seeking brains.)